Poets, Poetry and a Contest With Poems

I wanna talk about three poets.

Poet #1: Mikey Mason

advice for writers, professional ghostwriter





Mikey Mason is a geek comic and songwriter responsible for songs like She Don’t Like Firefly, Best Game Ever for which Gary Gygax’s family wrote him a thank you note, and sheer poetry like you’ll find in Han Solo Cool

If I could just be cool like Han Solo

If I could misbehave like Captain Mal

If I could just be half as smooth as Lando

I could get a grip on life somehow

If I could kick some alien ass like Ripley

If I could make you laugh like Doctor Who

If I could follow treasure maps like Indy

They would always lead me back to you

Mikey’s newest album, “Dangerous Gifts” was recently released and is probably his best work yet. I recommend you check him out.

Poet #2: Jake F. Simons

professional ghostwriter

Jake F. Simons is my personal alter ego, the guy who writes stuff that I don’t necessarily want the kids I teach karate to find out about by accident.

In Jake’s book Wingmanyou meet poet Luie Grant. He’s sort of like Beavis or Butthead would be after a few more years of life experience and a couple of trips to prison.

Luie tends to spin extemporaneous poetry during the adventures he has with his good buddy Max Farkas.

Here’s one of his haiku:

At the Home Depot

With two lovely women

Do they still stock chains?

And a limerick he aimed at Max after a particularly bizarre animal encounter:

Your situation’s quite goofy

But don’t try to be aloofy

We’ve seen quite a bit

Some really strange shit

But who knew monkeys used roofies?

TCK Publishing released Jake’s short story collection Five Days of Farkas earlier this month.

Poet #3: YOU

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That’s right. YOU have the chance to win a free copy of both “Dangerous Gifts” and Five Days of Farkas. Here’s how.

Comment here, on Facebook or on my G+ profile with the filthiest, wrongest, sickest, most don’t-tell-your-mom-you-wrote-this haiku you can come up with that uses no curse words, anatomical terms for naughty bits or scenes of graphic violence. Your job is to force the reader to imagine something more horrible than you could ever actually describe.

  • You can enter as often as you like.
  • Deadline is Monday, November 26th.
  • I will announce the winner (the very best entry) on the Friday after Thanksgiving.
  • The winner will receive a free copy of both works.
  • Two second-place winners (drawn randomly from qualifying entries) will receive either the music or the book.

So what are you waiting for? Get to it.

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